Background in middle class family

My father is loved not only for his generous caracter, happy smiles & jokes, his intelligence, his self made man spirit, 100% family man, but also for his work ethics (best quality, clean, good quantity/generous, good service).

He started working hard since age 14 as a worker for a pattiserie, bought his own bike and became a porter, at 17 he went to work for the ´Stoomvaart maatschappij Nederland¨ (big cargo ship company) as a kitchen boy, and at age 23 he was the youngest chef de cuisine, stayed with this company for 10 years (in the 50ies60ies) he travelled the world and worked hard and had fun as well. He had many adventures and we had the fortune of many times great storytelling.

Then he met my mother and she assisted him in building his own kingdom and dream: a well organised happy family.

The family was like a well organised kingdom.  We had everything: greatest food, a horse, nice clothes and above all: a family that was joyeous.

Being the member of this hard working middle class family with a store taught me: the in and outside of having a bussiness and being in service. I also learned that quality is key factor for any service and productAlso I learned that being able to cope with all that work one must enjoy life. Taking care of yourself. I learned that hard working and a good life are a must combination for succes as a person in this life. 

Being his own king, dad was well dressed, scents by Armani & Boss, looked alike Robert de Niro, had his new Volvo stationwagen and his family  well dressed. A dream of any self-made man.

Dad had made his plans and his daughter prinses (me) was wel protected, I had my own horse. So I grow up in nature far away from the city.

We went on vacations and could do any sport. Dad one day came home with a surf board the start of ´surf fever´ that never left.

At age 14, I started to help in the shop, they asked me to help with bringing in the vegetables and fruits from outside to the cooling. I also went to bring orders to older ladies. Then also on schoolholidays.  

At 15 applied at Mac Donalds and after a thorough interview and work introduction they told me I could start. I told dad I have a job at this place and after working there 2 x  dad said: ´so you like to make money, how much they pay you´? I said ´6 guilder´ and he said: ´I give you 14´, so I left the MD directly. I worked happlily with them till my 20ies. On Saturdays, everyday bringing in to cooler and on holidays.

From working in the store of my parents I learned: the costumer is queen / king and when there is a complaint (seldom) there was no discussion directly they replaced the fruit/veg.

Also the food for us workers was very organised, we all had our own coffee and lunch break.  

When I was 18 dad asked me what I wanted to become. I said art teacher. He daid I choose something better because in art you cannot make money and he wanted me to be able to make my own money not to become dependant on a man. Very modern view for such a traditional man. So as a good daughter I went back to the book with proffessions and choose physiotherapy because I did not need maths for this study and I had been a disaster at maths and had dropped it. Those days it was not yet obligatory (luck for the creative girl I was). 

At 20 years, Dad offered me 2 houses and a car. Including the store. I said: ¨dad I allready do physio and soon will be graduated¨. 

Reasons to decline were more than that. I didn't want to be a person who got it the easy way. I wanted to build it my own. 

He replied: ¨then I will sell it¨. However later reflecting on it, I think I crushed his dream.  Allthough he did not show it. Its always the same story, the child needs to go its own way, making its own legacy. But it pains the parent because he had so much good in mind. Especially dad who had seen the world from so many angles and wanted to protect me. However, I did wanted to make it by myself, although many times I have regretted. Times when in deep poverty, no money and waiting for next week, when the money comes... however it had to be this way. I had to see all this, to know, it is important for my mission. To know all lives. Trough this I can relate I feel with everyone. No matter what is their lifestyle. Especially now at my age of 50+ I've think I've seen all lifestyles. I studied them they didn't know but I studied how they think, what they eat, how their actions and reactions are.

Here I learned that choiches made in a split second have lifelong consequences which we need to deal with in grace